Sunday, December 25, 2005

Have yourself a merry little..OH MY GOT IT'S HEATHROW!

Yes my brave beloved readers, I have left you in a jet plane....
AAAaaaaah The rarified air of the jet set!
What bliss, What thrill....
Damn it! The earphone is out! I only get stereo sound in my left ear!
This Means something!
I'm SURE of IT!
The fact that the plane is bitterly, and I do mean BITTERLY empty, on this Christmas day may be it.
It might be where htis mild....but getting stronger ... case of paranoia is setting in.

Nina Simone is singing...or at least was singing "I Put a Spell On You"....
Now it's David Grey singing... "As I'm Leaving"...

Beirut seems to be just a dirty stain on the lower end of my trousers now... well that and an acrid smell of cigarette smoke that just doesn't wash out.

The British English is jarring and as my jaw gets back into joint... I feel the flush of cockney rolling into a blossom on my tongue.
My mother's constant refining through English diction get's another lick at the top of my mouth and I feel it....SUN?!?!? What the *^$%! England is supposed to be depressing drizzly and... well a cloudy mess...But it isn't! IT'S SUNNY!
Beirut STOLE England's weather!

My leaving came just in time to witness Noah's second coming.
The slat metal covers (curse their creator to be discussed in the biking post) weakening as the gutters vomit back their meals of bygone sunny days.
My crippled sparkly blue NikeAir Vapors were subjected to several attempts at drowning in bottomless puddles as I skidded my sorry way to Ouzai ....
Subjected to a 5 thou 'servisss' ride
ok so I admit it
the poor guy's shock at my bartering won me over!
But I digress as you can see in the picture( please God in your wisdom make it fit to have my readers pleased at my attempts to paost this) the state of the left one is HORRID!

The Air decided not to be part of the WHOLE NikeAir thing on my left shoe and instead ran away to the circus of shoedom and decided to become....A SQUIRT GUN!!
ALL ye who walk near me...It isn't me being my friendly self...
It's just my shoe, in effect, weeing what puddle I recently swam in, up the side of your leg.

Topic for today... Security in Lebanon... or for that matter... anywhere...
Does anyone else feel unsafe seeing a brilliant young lad of 18 (if that) slinging around a loaded weapon near highly volitile JET A FUEL???
I mean he did just get over the whole dicey age of 16 with GOD ONLY KNOWS what sort of hormones doing... I can only guess what to his vulnerable young mind...The idea that the aftereffects haven't worn off is... well.....CHILLING

God BLESS our beloved cough cough leaders, who think it fit to have these kids with their fingers on the trigger, protecting us from....
Idiots who think religion guarantees them Heaven if they just get this truckload of explosives as close to as many innocent victims as possible.
Of course, if brainwashing highschool has done it's job..way up in the steppes of the Himalayas out in Pakistan.... this guy is unstoppable!

It's dirty!
But our catch an orphan program and turn him into a laser guided targeting system seems a DANDY of an investment!
What gets these bastards completely devoid of morals....
ARE OUR TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE ...somehow.... doing this?

Pardon me, but does this make any sense, to at least one person, who isn't certified cookie cutter in the nut loaf member's monthly wickets watchers of the Karachi Wahabi Provisional Insane Asylum?

It's just as bad on BOTH sides of this security thing!
The moral of the story is your author
after close inspection and analysis
between the readings due for our BELOVED MPH degree
celebrations of Menaeesh MADNESS that roll up into events paralleling Roman celebrations of Bacchus, and the occasional bike ride...Security and Terrorism seem to be sides of the same coin.
For some of you close listeners the reason I had hoped would restrain you singing my infamous quote
“the coin never, NEVER, EVER has JUST two sides” quote.
It’s true!
The coin doesn’t ever have JUST two sides but that won’t let me escape the fact that if the money is FUNNY it isn’t money it’s CRAZY!
We all know that Crazy is generally NOT RECOMMENDED when dealing in things that Kill people.
Killing people has a strange sort of permanence to it.

That’s it…(My, MY what BRILLIANT READERS I HAVE!!!) get it right the first time because you can’t take the rubber end of your pencil and just fix it. (OH I AM SOO PROUD OF YOU LOT!!)

So upon completing this Blog I shall post it in Heathrow International Holding Pen subjected to Starbucks, expensive internet, and the possible lack of a USB to plug to attempt an upload.